Would you rather:
1. go skydiving OR bungee jumping? Definitely skydiving. If the parachute fails you’re surely dead.
2. eat pickled goat liver OR broiled chicken feet?
   Goat liver with a nice Stella to wash it down.
3. own 50 cats OR 5 elephants? Easy, 50 cats. We already have 2 cats but 0 elephants.
4. hit and kill an old man with your car OR be the cause of a fire that burns down the homes of five families, but nobody dies?
   Sure, now you had to get serious. Kill the old man. My reasons are my own. Let’s just say they involve and oil well and a guitar with one string missing.

The Global Anti-Golf Movement has a manifesto that calls for:

>1. An immediate moratorium on all golf course development.

>2. An open and public environmental and social review/audit of existing golf courses.

>3. Existing golf courses should be converted to public parks, and where they lie in forest areas, wetlands and islands, there should be rehabilitation and regeneration of the land to its natural state.

>4. Investigations into illegalities in the golf industry, including illegal occupation of public lands and encroachment into protected forests, diversion of water, violation and evasion of corporate regulations and corruption. We call on governments to prosecute the violators.

>5. Laws should be passed to prohibit the advertising and promotion of golf courses and golf tourism.

>6. Overseas development assistance , from countries including Japan Australia and European public founds should not be used for the promotion of golf courses and golf tourism or the construction of infrastructure related to such development.

I’ll stop supporting golf courses when they pry the club from my cold stiff hands.

Good thing Serena Williams is a hell of a good tennis player because her fashion sense sucks.

Fun little thread of movie titles and descriptions.

>Ferris Beuller’s Daylight — A teenager skips school to hang with his friends, but finds himself trapped in a New York city tunnel with only Sylvester Stalone to save him…

>”Close Encounters of the Sixth Sense” — Little boy sees dead aliens.

>”Raging Bull Durham” – Robert DeNiro beats up Kevin Costner. What more could you want?

Sign seen during the protests at the RNC convention in New York City.
Classic.

Absolutely insane story of one man’s battle with a ninja squirrel.

>“Now picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a slightly squirrel torn t-shirt, and only one leather glove roaring at maybe 70mph and rapidly accelerating down a quiet residential street…on one wheel and with a demonic squirrel on his back. The man and the squirrel are both screaming bloody murder.”

Wilson Mizner

>“A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something.”

You knew it had to come. Instead of supporting the Democrats by purchasing Heinz (as in Mrs. Kerry) Ketchup, you can now buy W Ketchup.

Their tagline reads:
>You don’t support Democrats.

Why should your ketchup?

E. B. White

>“Humor can be dissected as a frog can, but the thing dies in the process and the innards are discouraging to any but the pure scientific mind.”

So the NYC police are so uptight about protests at the RNC convention that they started arresting people on Friday night.
Pictures and first hand report.

(Via Kottke)