More travel – this time for fun.

The trusty suitcase has hardly had time to air out but it’s time to hit the road again.  This time, however, it’s for fun – not business.

I’m off to Ottawa Thursday morning to attend the Canadian Aviation Heritage Society annual general meetings. CAHS is the oldest and largest organization in the world dedicated to the celebration and documentation of Canada’s flying heritage.

This year’s meetings have some really special events that I’m looking forward to attending. Thursday night, we’re off to the Canadian Aviation Museum for a BBQ and behind the scenes tour.  Saturday, it’s on the bus to Vintage Wings of Canada in Gatineau Quebec to see the country’s largest collection of privately owned classic and warbird aircraft.

We got a sneak peek at one of the aircraft when they flew their De Havilland Fox Moth into Downsview for the Wings and Wheels Festival.

De Havilland DH83 Fox Moth

It’s nice to be flying for fun for a change.

Aaackkkkk

I feel like shit!There’s nothing better to be away on a business trip and come down with the flu.  I feel like crap. In about 16 hours, I have to get on a plane and fly for 7 hours with a stuffed head and a body that feels like I’ve gone 10 rounds with Mike Tyson.

To top it all off, I’m having a real problem getting a project completed that is now *only* 2 months overdue.  The client is beating me up so I’m trying to get it resolved when all I want to do is climb into my hard hotel bed, bury my head in the really thin pillows and hide under the too-short duvet until it’s time to head for the airport.  I’ve already promised a colleague from Toronto who’s also over here in Switzerland that we’ll get together tonight for diner which involves hopping a train from Winterthur to Kloten and back so it looks like there’s no rest for the wicked (or the sick).

The next person that tells me I’m so lucky to be able to travel around the world on business is going to get a punch in the face.  And I’ll cough on them.  That will teach them.

The insanity that is airport security

image Patrick Smith, a commercial airline pilot, writes a scathing article in The New York Times today.   In it, he blasts the absurd measures taken by the TSA to “protect” the American flying public.

“How we got to this point is an interesting study in reactionary politics, fear-mongering and a disconcerting willingness of the American public to accept almost anything in the name of “security.” Conned and frightened, our nation demands not actual security, but security spectacle. And although a reasonable percentage of passengers, along with most security experts, would concur such theater serves no useful purpose, there has been surprisingly little outrage. In that regard, maybe we’ve gotten exactly the system we deserve.”

Captain Smith wonders why flight crews are subject to the same theatrical screening as the passengers while airport workers, who have just as much access to aircraft and the ramp areas, are only randomly checked.  Once the door is closed and the plane start to taxi, we trust these professionals with our lives.  Yet, we treat them like criminals.

There’s no way to make air travel 100% safe and most of the screening procedures would do little to thwart a determined fanatic.  To continue the charade just to fool the sheep is ludicrous. 

The leader of the band has died

Dan Fogelberg passed away today at the age of 56 from prostrate cancer.  Famous for songs such as “Leader Of The Band”, “Longer” and “Auld Lang Syne”, Fogelberg was born in August 1951 making him just a few months older than me.

I loved his music even if it was known for being a little sappy.  His collaboration with Tim Weisberg on the album “Twin Sons From Different Mothers” was a seminal fusing of jazz and folk.

For your consideration, here’s a video of his Run For The Roses.

One of my favourite songs was “Nexus” from the album  The Innocent Age.  Great lyrics:

Across the vein of night
There cuts a path of searing light
Burning like a beacon
On the edges of our sight
At the point of total darkness
And the lights divine divide
A soul can let its shadow stretch
And land on either side –
either side.

And balanced on the precipice
The moment must reveal
Naked in the face of time
Our race within the wheel
As we hang beneath the heavens
And we hover over hell
Our hearts become the instruments
We learn to play so well.

Wealthy the spirit that knows its
own flight
Stealthy the hunter who slays
his own fright
Blessed the traveler who journeys
the length of the light.

Outside the pull of gravity
Beyond the spectral veil
Within our careful reasoning
We search to no avail
For the constant in the chaos
For the fulcrum in the void
Following a destiny
Our steps cannot avoid.

Across the vein of night
There cuts a path of searing light
Burning like a beacon
On the edges of our sight
At the point of total darkness
And the lights divine divide
A soul can let its shadow
Stretch and land on either side.

Wealthy the spirit that knows its
own flight
Stealthy the hunter who slays
his own fright
Blessed the traveler who journeys
the length of the light.

In a spiral never-ending
Are we drawn towards the source
Spinning at the mercy of an
unrelenting force
So we stare into the emptiness
and fall beneath the weight
Circling the Nexus in a
fevered dance with fate –

Wealthy the spirit that knows its
own flight
Stealthy the hunter who slays
his own fright
Blessed the traveler who journeys
the length of the light.

Coffee, tea or "Get your own!"

A collection of comments from the annual ZAGAT airline survey .

“They think nothing is too good for you, and that’s what they provide.”

“The only thing you can hope for is a short flight”

“Their planes make Larry King look young”

“Sitting any closer might constitute marriage in some states”

“I’d rather be a package on FedEx”

“If they could have pay toilets, they would”

“Makes standing in line at the DMV seem like fun”

“They fired the last employee found smiling”

“Only thing worse than flying them is the delay to fly them”

“Equipment must have been used by Lindbergh”

“When asked what kind of chicken they had, she replied ‘the dead kind’”

“I thought the Geneva Convention prevented this kind of thing”

“Only good thing about first class these days is that you leave the plane first”

“Flight schedules are for customers’ amusement”

“Gets you from point a to point b – except if you fly through Philly.”

“Livestock travels under better conditions”

“If a butterfly sneezes, everything gets delayed”

“They lose your luggage between Boston and Buffalo and give you someone in Manila to talk to about it”

“Don’t enter the toilet without a hazmat suit”

“Website is slower than my 100 year-old grandmother”

“The legroom is great if you’re a yard gnome”

“First they make you need a drink, then charge you for it.”

In praise of older aircraft

British Airways 747-400

My flight back home was on one of the venerable British Airways 747-400s.  As we draw nearer to the first revenue flight of the  Airbus 380 on October 25th, the 747 will be relegated to the status of the second biggest commercial aircraft.

The chances of me ever flying the 380 are remote, Toronto just isn’t on anyone’s list of destinations for the flying whale.  Hopefully, I’ll still have plenty of opportunity to board the 747.

Boeing literally bet the company when it announced plans to build the world’s largest aircraft way back in 1965.  Five years later, PanAm flew the first passengers from New York to London Heathrow and the world of air travel was never the same.  The initial forecast of 400 planes produced has grown to over 1400 deliveries.

The very first 747 I ever flew on was a CP Air (Canadian Pacific Airlines) 100 series way back in 1982.  The Empress of China was a lovely bird – all orange and silver – and an incredible sight.  Huge and majestic.  The first thought upon seeing one was “How do they get this thing off the ground?”.  Four massive engines putting out over 63,000 pounds of thrust each lift almost 1 million pounds gracefully.  There’s still nothing like the sight of a 400 with wings flexed at a seemingly impossible angle rising slowly, almost too slowly, as it embarks on a long overseas journey.

Big Bird

Descriptions of the size of the 747 are hard to grasp so a picture like this one gives you some impression of just how big the bird really is.  A Qantas 747-400ER being pushed back at Heathrow Saturday afternoon as we prepared to leave.  A powerful tug and the ground communicator dwarfed by the immense aircraft.  Longreach indeed.

Qantas 747-400

Same aircraft, spooling up in preparation to taxi out to the active.

Wing Flex

Finally, shot along the wing as we cruise at 36,000 feet at .98 mach over the Atlantic. Compare the straight wing of the Qantas above with the flex shown here.  On the ground, you can’t even see the outboard engine but once she takes to the air, the wing tip rises until you swear it’s going to snap.

The future of the 747 is cloudy.  For sure, the existing airframes will continue in service for decades to come but there’s not much interest in Boeing’s next version, the 747-800i.  The “Intercontinental” is not seeing any orders though a lot of interest is being shown in a freighter version.  Airbus may rule the skies when it comes to VLCT (Very Large Commercial Transport) but airlines are unsure if 800 passenger aircraft are the wave of the future or whether smaller, more fuel efficient models like the Boeing 787 or the Airbus A350 make better sense.

Whatever the future, the 747 stands as a testament to the vision and ingenuity of Boeing’s designers.  A great aircraft that will always be my favorite.

I thought the "Ugly American" was just a memory

Check-in at Zurich airport.  Early morning, very crowded, very chaotic.  Standing in line with the rest of the sheeple, we were treated to the antics of a, clearly, American tourist on his way home.

Not content to stand patiently in line, he proceeded to bull his way to the front.  Old ladies with their massive luggage were no match for this protector of the free world. ”Back of the line!”, a brave soul suggested as he stormed through.  “I’m in business class.”, was his snarky retort.

Guess what?  So am I and most of the other people.  Not his problem.  All bullshit and bluster he got to the desk and proceeded to make a big show for the captive audience.  The rest of us just shook are heads and shuffled forward.  It took me another 20 minutes to get through, 5 minutes for passport control and then a 2 minute train ride to the security line.

Guess who I met up with?  Yep, his highness had to stand in another line and he was none to happy.  Unfortunately for him, you can’t bully security so he had to meekly submit to the indignities of low level functionaries and their procedures.

Why do people feel the need to act like assholes?  What does it get them?  Air travel is a slow, frustrating business these days.  You might as well make the best of it.

I’m now sitting in the same lounge as he is waiting for my flight.  With my luck, he’ll be my seatmate on the trip to Heathrow.  Perhaps I’ll be able to bask in his glory close up.  Be still my heart.

A jinxed date?

Jan was looking at the blog the other day and she was surprised to see that I hadn’t written anything specifically about our 25th anniversary which was Monday, August 20th.

She’s right.  Not a word.

Perhaps it’s because I spent that day flat on my back lying in a hospital bed with IV fluid and morphine dripping into my veins.  No that’s not it – I was groggy but not completely out of it.

The real reason I haven’t written anything was because I disappointed her and it tears me up everything time I think of it.  Instead of smelling the salt air in Halifax, my body decided to play the cruelest of tricks on us.  Less than 12 hours before we were set to fly out, the surgeon took a scalpel to all the plans we had made.  We were finally set to actually take 2 weeks away from work to have the vacation we’d dreamed about.  Halifax, Cape Breton Island and Prince Edward Island.  Being together in the great outdoors without a care in the world.  Great scenery, good food, new places; it was supposed to be perfect. 

Instead, it all went to shit because of a little bit of something that medicine cannot even begin to fathom why it even exists.  Jan was sure that work would intrude and something would come up that required my attendance like it has for every planned vacation over the last 15 years.  I’d planned everything so that wouldn’t happen.  My coworkers had gone out of their way to help make sure that all contingencies were covered.  We were free.  We were screwed.

Two years ago, my sister died on August 20th.  Everything became a blur as we made urgent plans to get to England.  Jan stayed behind and never said a word.  I made up my mind then and there that our 25th would be memorable.  She chose the Maritimes as our destination and I started the planning.  Our anniversary dinner would be at “The Press Gang”, one of Halifax’s finest restaurants.  Three days to travel up and down the Atlantic coast visiting Lunenberg, Peggy’s Cove and a dozen other spots that we hoped to stumble upon.  Then, it was a drive up to Cape Breton for a couple of days in that wild country.  Perhaps a whale watching cruise.  Check out some of the Acadian culture.  Finally, off to Charlottetown for 3 days exploring the unsullied beauty that is Prince Edward Island.

Instead, I spent 5 days in hospital followed by another week of laying around the house while she looked after me.  It just isn’t fair.

We’re back to work now but I know that she is disappointed.  To come so close to heaven only to be thrown into hell.

She deserves so much for putting up with me for almost 3 decades.  I say “next year dear, we’ll try again” but I can see it in her eyes, she doesn’t believe me.  Why should she?

Boeing plate – circa 1950′s

Boeing plate by Vernon Kilns

Though I concentrate on airline ashtrays, I couldn’t pass this one up.  Vernon Kilns made millions of pieces of dinnerware and commemorative plates in the 30′s, 40′s and 50′s.  There’s nothing very special about most of them and  lots be easily found on eBay or specialty china websites. Aircraft commemoratives are a different story.

This one, of course, is interesting to me because of what it depicts. Boeing was incorporated in 1916 as the “Pacific Aero Products Co.”  The first aircraft was the “B&W” seaplane which can be seen at the 10 o’clock position on the plate.

In 1917, the company name changed to the “Boeing Airplane Company”.  The history continues with depiction of the B-1 seaplane from 1919, the 1938 314 “Clipper” which opened up transoceanic travel for passengers, the 307 “Stratorliner” from 1939 which was the first pressurized-cabin transport aircraft and the B-15 bomber from 1957.image

Front and center is the  B-17-E “Flying Fortress” which was produced in great numbers and was one of the workhorses of the Second World War.  The Memphis Belle is probably the most famous of all the 17s made.

The back of the plate contains some Boeing history along with “Designed Exclusively for Frederick & Nelson Seattle by Vernon Kilns U.S.A”.  Frederick & Nelson was a department store chain that became part of Marshall Field.  Vernon Kilns went out of business in 1958.

The plate is in beautiful shape and I’ve got my eye out for others.  It appears that there are a total of 9 plates that were made commemorating aircraft manufacturers including Douglas and Curtis-Wright.

Back from Switzerland – what day is it?

Espresso HellBack from Switzerland and I’m really beat.

Yesterday was the longest travel day I’ve ever experienced and I still can’t get a handle on what day or time my body clock really thinks it is.  I had an opportunity to come back a day early which I immediately grabbed but it’s hard to say whether or not it was worth it.

My Friday morning started when the alarm went off at 4:30 (10:30 pm Thursday night Toronto time).  Caught the train at 5 to 6 for the short trip to Zurich airport.  Long crazy time at check-in which didn’t leave me much time to make the flight, only to find that we were delayed by fog.  Then the 2 hour flight to Heathrow.

Heathrow is always a madhouse.  I’m amazed at how busy that place is and anyone who thinks that Toronto’s Pearson International is a major airport only needs to make one connection through LHR to see how bush league YYZ really is.

Of course, I wasn’t in a hurry because my flight didn’t leave for nearly 5 1/2 hours.  Luckily, I was flying business class so I got to hang out in the lounge.  Many coffees later, we finally got to board where we endured another delay as 3 idiots decided not to show up even though their baggage had been loaded.

The trip across the Atlantic was very smooth and the Club World seating on the British Airways 767 is incredibly comfortable (for airline seating).   I actually managed to get a few hours sleep, watched a movie and had a really nice meal of shrimp and salmon.

We arrived in Toronto at the same time that 4 or 5 other international flights came in so it was a sprint to the customs area to beat the crowds.  Got through clean but had a long wait for the luggage to arrive.  My 3 wheeled bag, casulty of the flight over, finally showed up so it was off to grab a limo for the ride home.

3 airports, 2 flights, 1 train, from waking up to hitting the sack, 22 1/2 hours.  What the hell day is it?